"Hello, my name is Karen, I am a Sophomore double majoring in English and Theatre Tech."
I am taking 15 credit hours spread between 6 classes this semester and today was spent getting to know the professors and the other students. I had no problem finding any of my classes until I had to go to Eppler Center. Now, to understand my dilemma, you have to know that this building has North, South, and Center wings that look as if they are connected on the outside but once you step into the building, you feel like a rat in a maze chasing a hunk of cheese. I got to my Spanish class where my teacher only speaks...German...just kidding...Spanish (AHH!) just in time. As I was walking out of the building my iPod somehow got tangled in between my legs, around my neck, and stuck in my zipper. I was focusing on my iPod and texting-- forcing me to walk like a drunk driver and BAM! I walked into a glass door full force. All I could do was laugh until I realized a guy was holding the actual door and I had walked into the window next to it.
Him: While holding back uncontrollable laughter, "Are you OK?"
Me: "Ha! Ha! Yeah, you did not see that."
Him: "See what?"
Somehow that cheesy line made me feel a whole lot better, something about knowing he was at least nice to my face is great regardless if he went to his next class and said, "BAHAHA! I totally just saw this ugly chick walk into a window!"
UFFDA.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Friday, January 9, 2009
Finale
As excited as I am to see my friends in Columbus tonight, it is going to be hard leaving my mother back here in Knoxville. Ma and I haven't lived together this long since before the divorce and I was nervous as to see how we would work it out. Only a few tears were shed and all two of them were due to extreme sleep deprivation while we were talking about non-violent communication with other family members. It is difficult to put into words how much I truly miss having ma around, I know she will/is reading this and without getting too sappy I just wanted to say a few words.
Ma,
What a year! Whew. We made it to 2009 and as your 50th birthday FAST approaches, I find it totally and completely necessary to let you in on a few secrets...I stole your long black scarf about two years ago when I came to visit and you are never getting your CD player back. I apologize but that is a really nice scarf and the CD player picks up radio stations. After spending a few weeks here I have decided that you are not a Minnesotan any more; the "unreasonably cold" 50 degree weather here in Knoxville threw me off so much that I am still trying to figure out if I missed Christmahanukwanzicolstice or not. Though the red and green holiday pizza was awesome, I prefer you give up cooking all together, you are too much of an awesome person to waste away in the kitchen. Please stay away from all sharp, hot, or otherwise dangerous objects including the blunt ones. I know you would prefer not to but please get rid of the "hello, 80's" sweater you wore the other day or I will have to report you to What Not to Wear and they will make you start dressing for style not comfort. I am unsure how you do it day in and day out, sixteen 2-6 year olds is a lot to deal with and I cannot say it enough how proud I am to be your daughter. I now realize I was running away from my life and problems by looking into the Air Force, it was incredible that you drove to BGSU to save my ass two weekends in a row. I still want to fly, but strengthening the wings you once gave me is more important right now than what grade I get in biology or if I work this next semester. Thanks to you I can pour blue water from one cup to another, tell you the capital of Zimbabwe, separate my clothes for wash correctly (each color a separate load), and of course, wash dishes by hand. I will never understand why after having a hellion like me, you would choose to teach, but more power to you ma. We might have had our differences about how to look at life, but ma, you're stuck with me.
"Our final developmental task is to value ourselves without our gifts." -Dr. Mary Jurisson
Ma,
What a year! Whew. We made it to 2009 and as your 50th birthday FAST approaches, I find it totally and completely necessary to let you in on a few secrets...I stole your long black scarf about two years ago when I came to visit and you are never getting your CD player back. I apologize but that is a really nice scarf and the CD player picks up radio stations. After spending a few weeks here I have decided that you are not a Minnesotan any more; the "unreasonably cold" 50 degree weather here in Knoxville threw me off so much that I am still trying to figure out if I missed Christmahanukwanzicolstice or not. Though the red and green holiday pizza was awesome, I prefer you give up cooking all together, you are too much of an awesome person to waste away in the kitchen. Please stay away from all sharp, hot, or otherwise dangerous objects including the blunt ones. I know you would prefer not to but please get rid of the "hello, 80's" sweater you wore the other day or I will have to report you to What Not to Wear and they will make you start dressing for style not comfort. I am unsure how you do it day in and day out, sixteen 2-6 year olds is a lot to deal with and I cannot say it enough how proud I am to be your daughter. I now realize I was running away from my life and problems by looking into the Air Force, it was incredible that you drove to BGSU to save my ass two weekends in a row. I still want to fly, but strengthening the wings you once gave me is more important right now than what grade I get in biology or if I work this next semester. Thanks to you I can pour blue water from one cup to another, tell you the capital of Zimbabwe, separate my clothes for wash correctly (each color a separate load), and of course, wash dishes by hand. I will never understand why after having a hellion like me, you would choose to teach, but more power to you ma. We might have had our differences about how to look at life, but ma, you're stuck with me.
"Our final developmental task is to value ourselves without our gifts." -Dr. Mary Jurisson
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Do you think you are having panic attacks?
"I rarely have nightmares anymore"...famous last words right God?!
I have been working with my mom at her school all week but have been going upstairs and sleeping the majority of the day away; this means one of two thing, 1) I am not sleeping at all at night but instead playing online or watching television, or 2) I am sleeping at night but the sleep I am getting is worth nothing more than a penny paid against our debt built up during this war we have recently found ourselves in. Night before last I had a nightmare that was so scary that when when questioned, I did not want to talk about it but instead just turned the question around on the one asking. I guess now is probably a good time to talk about it considering I use this blog as a form of really really cheap therapy as well as an informative piece. I woke up drenched in sweat after (in my dream), dying my hair blond while in some sort of witness protection group, joining a drug counseling group and living in a "safe" house where keys weren't used but instead codes to every door including my bedroom and the bathroom. I remember standing in my house doing this and that and someone who eerily looked like Mr. Big from Sex and the City walked in. I guess somehow I knew he shouldn't have been there and I ran but before I could get the back door code in, my finger was blown off by a gun shot. I woke up shortly after all this happened and have absolutely no idea what could have set that kind of nightmare off. Today, I was exhausted in the classroom and did not really see any child in desperate need for attention so I went upstairs to read, I read a few chapters and fell asleep. This time, the nightmare flip flopped between two scenes. In one scene, I was at a basketball game desperately searching for a paper fan in the shape of a sun, I was much younger and without this fan I think I could not properly cheer for my team. Strange...ya think?! The other scene was at a water park in an innertube with two other people and we were on a water slide that seemed to be a skate park 1/2 pipe. The innertube would go up one side and then down and to the other side but would go to far and flip over, the water was soapy and the bubbles kept getting in my face to only suffocate me like at the foam party in BG. Every time we would flip over I would nearly drowned. Today I woke up with all my muscles sore as if I had been flexing for the previous two hours and I was still exhausted. I am sure there is an underlaying reason or meaning behind these nightmares but I am really just getting tired of them. I am happy, quite frankly, it's about damn time that I am happy...these past two years have sucked but the last two days have just been weird.
I have been working with my mom at her school all week but have been going upstairs and sleeping the majority of the day away; this means one of two thing, 1) I am not sleeping at all at night but instead playing online or watching television, or 2) I am sleeping at night but the sleep I am getting is worth nothing more than a penny paid against our debt built up during this war we have recently found ourselves in. Night before last I had a nightmare that was so scary that when when questioned, I did not want to talk about it but instead just turned the question around on the one asking. I guess now is probably a good time to talk about it considering I use this blog as a form of really really cheap therapy as well as an informative piece. I woke up drenched in sweat after (in my dream), dying my hair blond while in some sort of witness protection group, joining a drug counseling group and living in a "safe" house where keys weren't used but instead codes to every door including my bedroom and the bathroom. I remember standing in my house doing this and that and someone who eerily looked like Mr. Big from Sex and the City walked in. I guess somehow I knew he shouldn't have been there and I ran but before I could get the back door code in, my finger was blown off by a gun shot. I woke up shortly after all this happened and have absolutely no idea what could have set that kind of nightmare off. Today, I was exhausted in the classroom and did not really see any child in desperate need for attention so I went upstairs to read, I read a few chapters and fell asleep. This time, the nightmare flip flopped between two scenes. In one scene, I was at a basketball game desperately searching for a paper fan in the shape of a sun, I was much younger and without this fan I think I could not properly cheer for my team. Strange...ya think?! The other scene was at a water park in an innertube with two other people and we were on a water slide that seemed to be a skate park 1/2 pipe. The innertube would go up one side and then down and to the other side but would go to far and flip over, the water was soapy and the bubbles kept getting in my face to only suffocate me like at the foam party in BG. Every time we would flip over I would nearly drowned. Today I woke up with all my muscles sore as if I had been flexing for the previous two hours and I was still exhausted. I am sure there is an underlaying reason or meaning behind these nightmares but I am really just getting tired of them. I am happy, quite frankly, it's about damn time that I am happy...these past two years have sucked but the last two days have just been weird.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Montessori friend, not Monastery
It wasn't until I was in High School fighting ladies twice my size and paying $2.25 for 1/2 a lunch that I did not have to explain every day of my life that I did not go to a Monastery for school but indeed, a Montessori school. I have a week left of my vacation but already my mother is back at work with 12 pint sized children whos favorite thing to talk about is that girls have a vagina and boys come with a penis (to think with). I have been babysitting a few of the children in her class over the last few weeks for some cash to get me through next semester but I have somehow forgotten that dealing with one 5 year old is a whole lot easier than dealing with 12 5 year olds. It is interesting how frustrated they get when multiple people talk to them at once but they continue to believe that all adults have super powers and can listen to 2 or more high-pitched voices at once and completely understand every word. Even though I joke, I really do enjoy being in the classroom, we take for granted that we know how to pour water from one glass to another and that we can read without thinking about it anymore but to watch a two year old learn all the countries in Europe better than I is just astounding. I think it is remarkable how well children learn in this environment and adjust to the real world. It wasn't until High School that I sat at a desk and used a text book; it wasn't until High School that I wore shoes inside.
"We taught you that the Earth is round, and red and white make pink, and something else, that matters more, we taught you how to think," -Dr. Seuss, Hooray for Diffendoofer Day
"We taught you that the Earth is round, and red and white make pink, and something else, that matters more, we taught you how to think," -Dr. Seuss, Hooray for Diffendoofer Day
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Whore frost, lip rings, fairies, and ghosts
I was thinking about what to write in attempt to avoid all real work and I came up with a fair list:
1.Whore frost
2.Lip rings
3.Fairies
4.Ghosts
Now, I know what you are really wondering..."what the hell is whore frost...she made that up." I did no such thing. With my hands on my hips and my reading glasses perched on the edge of my nose, I explain, "whore frost is when ice grows up out of the ground like a flower...well, really there is no good way to describe, here is a picture."
This whore frost, sometimes mistaken for 'hoe frost,' just blankets the mountains in the Smoky Mountain National Park.
..........
I am sorely mistaken...though this is incredibly lamer than whore [hore] frost...this picture is apparently just a picture of "ground frost." [w]hore frost is indeed ice that looks like what is viewed in the picture above but jets off trees and other plant life...
This blog post just became incredibly boring, I apologize.
1.Whore frost
2.Lip rings
3.Fairies
4.Ghosts
Now, I know what you are really wondering..."what the hell is whore frost...she made that up." I did no such thing. With my hands on my hips and my reading glasses perched on the edge of my nose, I explain, "whore frost is when ice grows up out of the ground like a flower...well, really there is no good way to describe, here is a picture."
This whore frost, sometimes mistaken for 'hoe frost,' just blankets the mountains in the Smoky Mountain National Park.
..........
I am sorely mistaken...though this is incredibly lamer than whore [hore] frost...this picture is apparently just a picture of "ground frost." [w]hore frost is indeed ice that looks like what is viewed in the picture above but jets off trees and other plant life...
This blog post just became incredibly boring, I apologize.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
New Years 2009
I spent last night, New Years Eve, in my bed while reading Ellen Wolfe's Walking the Dream. It is a phenomenally well written novel about Wolfe's thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail. It is my own plan to thru-hike the AT in three years after I graduate from BGSU and picking up tips and learning the tricks from "Wolf Woman" will help me every step of the way. 126 text messages were received and sent from my phone last night, 90% of which were just "Happy New Year, Be Safe." The other 10% were me telling Tim how to play Risk, the board game. I gave him one rule: "Take Zimbabwe first," and he couldn't even follow that one simple rule...we will see about him! Though my New Year's Eve was totally uneventful I enjoyed just relaxing by myself and avoiding all trouble with the police.
"In all fairness, I had Zimbabwe at the end...because the World was MINE at the end..." -Tim Baughman
"In all fairness, I had Zimbabwe at the end...because the World was MINE at the end..." -Tim Baughman
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