Reasons I never worked "fast food."

2. Food is never supposed to be "fast," if your food is fast, its heart is probably still beating and you should put it back on the grill.

3. I walked into McDonalds the other day and could not help but notice no one was working who weighed under 250lbs. My bones are too little for all that.

4. I don't look good in hats.

5. I have microwaved enough living in the dorms for a lifetime.

6. I am a firm believer in not knowing where your food comes from isn't always a bad thing.

7. "I want A WHOPPER NO ONION!!!!"

8. I just can't imagine carrying out my childhood dream of being a McDonald's fry girl.

9. I am already too qualified with a High School degree.

10. I believe I am going to college to AVOID working in a fast food restaurant.

Save the boobies!

While eating my strawberry popsicle with the two children I have been babysitting the last two days, I found myself in a hysterical conversation between myself and the four year old. It was at that moment in time I realized I was in a safe home. "When I grow up I'll be able to drive...and I like the pretty bird on your boobie Karen!" A sweet little unsuspecting girl and then...she's checking me out! "When I grow up, I'll be able to have babies, and make boobie milk, and no-- my brother wont be able to do those things cause he's a boy! It would be pretty funny if a boy had babies and made boobie milk wouldn't Karen!" Wow-- I suppose children these days are provided with more answers and taught at a young age where EXACTLY babies come from. I believe I was given a book and told to read it. Such sweet children.

The little lady upstairs

I am sitting upstairs at my mother's school, Knoxville Montessori School, once again writing to you. I used to attend here when I was just a tike and it makes me giggle...yes, "giggle" realizing that now here I am, years later, assisting my mother with minions like myself (at one time). I hope I have grown up since then, I sure am taller, the metal slide I burned my butt on year after year is not quite as tall as it used to be and my feet drag when sitting in the swings or hanging on the high bar. I am convinced the yard equipment has all shrunk and I have kept the same 4ft 11.5in tall stature I had till I was in 9th grade. I still remember playing house in the old barn structure in the middle of the playground under the old oak tree we used to sit under while in trouble. That structure is long gone and that tree is a mere stump replaced with the building addition for the Elementary. Chalkboards for the wee ones attached to the side of the building have replaced the crumbling blacktop I was stung by my first bee on and earned my first scars near. I used to bury nuts for the squirrels to find and sing the Capitan America songs while running around as a chicken minus his head. My less than perfect but always beautiful art of my once conventional family hung in the office engulfing the walls and air conditioning unit. This place brings back many special memories that will always bond my mother and I including multiple time-outs and bottom beatings--maybe those aren't the best of memories but I am sure if you give me time I could think of a few better ones! I love you mom! Haha! At the end of the day, it is wonderful to be back in Knoxville, seeing past teachers, and most importantly, seeing my mother every day.

Get your lighters out, now lets rock.

...Alright...I am done...but these kids are AMAZING?!

Montessori friend, not Monastery

It wasn't until I was in High School fighting ladies twice my size and paying $2.25 for 1/2 a lunch that I did not have to explain every day of my life that I did not go to a Monastery for school but indeed, a Montessori school. I have a week left of my vacation but already my mother is back at work with 12 pint sized children whos favorite thing to talk about is that girls have a vagina and boys come with a penis (to think with). I have been babysitting a few of the children in her class over the last few weeks for some cash to get me through next semester but I have somehow forgotten that dealing with one 5 year old is a whole lot easier than dealing with 12 5 year olds. It is interesting how frustrated they get when multiple people talk to them at once but they continue to believe that all adults have super powers and can listen to 2 or more high-pitched voices at once and completely understand every word. Even though I joke, I really do enjoy being in the classroom, we take for granted that we know how to pour water from one glass to another and that we can read without thinking about it anymore but to watch a two year old learn all the countries in Europe better than I is just astounding. I think it is remarkable how well children learn in this environment and adjust to the real world. It wasn't until High School that I sat at a desk and used a text book; it wasn't until High School that I wore shoes inside.

"We taught you that the Earth is round, and red and white make pink, and something else, that matters more, we taught you how to think," -Dr. Seuss, Hooray for Diffendoofer Day